Most people on this site know me as the foodie that’s mildly (well, not mildly) obsessed with learning about restaurant history and fast food chains. That much is very true, but I have other passions outside of great food. One of them is dating, more specifically, the many relationship faux pas that can happen while searching for the One.
As someone who’s been on many a restaurant date, I’ve had my great moments in venues. I’ve also had guys vanish mid-date just to leave me with a bill and to call me fat. I’ve also been broken up with in restaurants. Here’s the fact: I feel bad for the people who had to watch me in my less than stellar moments at restaurants.
Guys, girls, and everyone else, I need to explain something. The trope of breaking up in a restaurant is a very bad one to follow. Here’s why.
Reason #1: It’s not appropriate.
I understand that breaking up in a public space can be a matter of safety because of how the other party may react, but a restaurant isn’t the best place to deal with this. People go out to have good vibes, not to witness other peoples’ drama.
Breakups make the ambiance awkward, and if you’re worried about them causing a scene, doing so in an area that is more public (with police nearby, if you’re worried about safety) is ideal.
Reason #2: You’re putting an undue burden on waiters.
Imagine what it would be like if your friend invited their ex and dumped them in your house, while you were hosting a dinner party. They bicker, your buddy dumps her, and she’s still trying to eat her meal while she’s crying her eyes out.
You’re stuck there, with a bunch of friends who are now not enjoying their meal and feeling awkward. You worked hard to make this night good. Now, it’s all ruined. It’s not fair, is it?
Well, newsflash! If you are breaking up with a significant other in the middle of dinner, that’s exactly what you’re doing to the waitstaff. It’s a really awkward burden, and yes, it affects your tips, too.
Reason #3: Doing this won’t always prevent an outburst.
I’ll be honest. People are not as emotionally stable as they used to be. In the past, this technique would be enough to make people control their behavior and avoid too many tears. Nowadays, people lose their cool over a phone rejection.
Let’s be honest. If people are now flipping out over a polite no, do you really think that they’re going to behave well in public? In a lot of cases, it won’t help them avoid an outburst. That said, a public breakup (near police, not in a restaurant with knives) can help you stay safe.
Reason #4: After you break up, you’re stuck eating food with each other.
Isn’t that awkward? It’s totally awkward.
Reason #5: No one who is eating wants to see a breakup unfurl.
Breakups are not fun to watch. They make peoples’ stomachs turn and often end up making it hard for them to focus on their meal. It’s rough, and it’s why waiters don’t want to have to deal with a couple breaking up on their shift. You guys make others uncomfortable.
So, please, let’s stop with the restaurant breakups. It’s time to really rethink this classic maneuver.